


New Moons

by BlackIbis (WanderingBandurria)



Series: ComfortMiniFest [5]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Albus Dumbledore Bashing, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Bad Parent Lyall Lupin, Drabble, Established Relationship, First War with Voldemort, Hopeful Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Magical Bond, Post-Sirius Black's Prank on Severus Snape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-09-28
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:00:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26692588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WanderingBandurria/pseuds/BlackIbis
Summary: After the prank, Remus is taken away from Hogwarts.After the prank, Sirius looks for him everywhere.Until he finds him.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Series: ComfortMiniFest [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1931170
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44





	New Moons

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So this was also for SwottyPotter's wolfstar comfort minifest. The prompt of this day was forgiveness. I wanted to reflect on forgiveness and reparation, as much as in the difference between forgiveness and self-forgiveness.  
> This is very open ended, but I hope you guys like this short snippet in this universe. Please read the tags - this is mostly in the angst area, so please consider that.  
> As always, all my love goes to my beta, LikeABellThroughTheNight, who was amazing and managed to check all these short fics in record time. I've learnt so much with you, thank you, again.  
> Still, since English is not my first lenguage, I still make some mistakes, and I correct some things after my beta, so if you spot any mistake, please let me know. I really do want to know it and getting feedback helps me improve my English so much.

They sit by the lake in silence, Remus devouring the food that Sirius brought. Their time together is short - Remus can’t risk being gone for more than a couple of hours if he doesn’t want to rise suspicions in the Pack, or even worse, end up hurt by the magic that bonds him with them.

“Moony,” Sirius says in a whisper, almost inaudible. Remus looks up from his empty food container, his face a mess with pieces of the meal all over it. Sirius smiles and cleans him with his thumb. “I’m sorry,” he says, casting his eyes down.

He can hear Remus’ sigh, and before he can look back up, Remus is settling on his lap, his thin arms coming around him, his nose resting on his neck.

“It’s alright, Padfoot,” he says, his breath tickling Sirius. Sirius shivers and puts his hands on Remus’ hips carefully, not wanting to mess this up - he needs to talk with Remus; he can’t let another month pass by without discussing the plans he’s been considering for the past three months. He moves his fingers up and down softly. Remus’ hips are so narrow now, with the lack of food in his daily diet.

Remus starts kissing his neck, nibbling and licking, and Sirius can’t stop himself from groaning lowly and pulling Remus more fully onto his lap. After a few minutes with Remus’ lips trailing down his neck, stopping at the crook and pushing his shirt aside to kiss his shoulder, Sirius reacts. He gives a soft squeeze to Remus’ hips, and takes his face between his hands softly, pulling back to look him in the eyes.

Remus tries to push forward to kiss him, his eyes full of determination, but Sirius shakes his head and looks sadly into Remus’ eyes.

“It’s my fault that you are here,” he says, feeling a lump in his throat. “That fucking prank. I never stopped to think and it ended up with you expelled and being forced…”

Remus sighs.

“We’d been over this already, Padfoot,” Remus says, grabbing Sirius’ wrists to pull his hands from his face so he can rest their foreheads together. “It could have happened in any other way, in one and a thousand different ways. And you’ve done enough now, Sirius. You found me after two years, even with all the spells my father used to make me untrackable. You found me, and you came over and over again, with food, with clothes, with spells that I could learn to make things manageable. You are here now. You don’t have to keep apologizing.”

Sirius threads his fingers through Remus’ dirty hair, untangling twigs and leaves. He weights his next words.

“Still, Moony, you are here, trapped with this pack because your father decided it was safer for you. I don’t think I’m doing enough if you are still living the consequences of my actions,” he says, and he can hear Remus sigh again, so he kisses him quickly. It’s just a peck, but it’s intended to make clear to Remus that he knows the protests that are about to come, so Remus stays quiet, and wiggles in Sirus’ lap, making Sirius’ breath hitch. He takes a deep breath, to try to put some order to his mind. “I went to see your mother last week,” he adds in a whisper, and at that, Remus freezes up, with his hands still on Sirius’ shoulders. “She’s no longer with your father,” he says carefully. “And she can receive you in her new home if you don’t want to come with me,” he says, softly. “Of course, I would love to have you with me, but I know that you might…”

“Sirius,” Remus says, and he sounds tired, but not angry. “You know that I can’t go back, not with the spells my father used. It's blood magic, it’s too powerful for you to break…”

Sirius pushes his fingers against Remus’ scalp, making him cock his head, seeking more contact. 

“I want to talk with Dumbledore, but only if you are alright with that, Moony. He’s been hinting,” and he swallows, because he doesn’t like what comes next, but he has been brainstorming options for months with James, Peter and Lily, and they couldn’t come with anything else. “He’s been hinting that we need to reach out to the magical creatures if we want to have any chance at winning the war. He has mentioned that the werewolves can be a powerful ally or a dangerous woe. I think,” he swallows and pulls back to look at Remus in the eyes, and Remus looks back at him, his brown eyes shining. “that he can probably disperse, or at least bend the spells that your father used to keep you with this pack. Maybe he can come up with an idea that only forces you to spend a limited amount of time here, so you can go further away and for longer periods. And I think he would do it if you tell him that you’ll work for the Order and go to meet with other werewolves to try to convince them to join us,” he says the last part in a whisper, looking over Remus’ shoulder. He can’t look him in the eyes, and the weight of the world settles with deep shame in his belly. He feels, _he knows_ this means weaponizing Remus once again, as he did with the Prank.

Remus stays quiet for almost a minute, and Sirius dares to look at him. He looks tired and thoughtful.

“Alright,” Remus says in the end. “It might be worth a shot,” he says, pushing his forehead against Sirius’, trailing his fingers from his shoulders to his neck, raising goosebumps on Sirius’ skin. “I want my life back. I want to see my mom, and James, Peter, and Lily, and I want to wake up with you in the mornings and kiss you whenever I want,” and Sirius’ stomach jumps in his belly at the idea of having Remus back in his life for long periods, and not only in these stolen moments that the new moon gives them, where Lyall’s spells are weaker given the changes in Remus’ magic. “I’ll do whatever Dumbledore wants me to do if that means that I get to spend most of my time with you.”

Sirius breaks at that, and after nodding shortly and mumbling, “I’ll talk to him, then,” he kisses Remus, hungrily, closing his eyes tightly to avoid letting the tears fall down.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me on [Tumblr](https://wanderingbandurria.tumblr.com/)


End file.
